Released

About three Mondays ago, I was sitting at my desk wondering how in the world I would ever catch up or fix the issues that I have on some projects when one of my coworkers sent me a message: I had a nice thought about you -- something nice to hear when life doesn't feel right. 

And it's Monday again and I spent most of the morning feeling frozen. I've been able to check some to-do items off my list and I've had some of the weight released from my shoulders but, as the 'Fugee said, It's mission impossible since I'm alone in my department...

Saw a hummingbird visit my zinnias yesterday which motivated me to put the hummingbird feeder back out. It's the second time that I've seen the hummingbird around 2 p.m. on Sunday and I spotted her or him multiple times yesterday. 

It's been so nice to see my butterfly, bee and hummingbird visitors...

While walking the other day, I listened to NPR's Fresh Air episode with Joy Harjo and Tiya Miles and I can't stop think about either segment.  Harjo singing her poem Fear -- I release you...I release you...I release you...I release you...

And I felt released for a few minutes. 

And Mile's recounting the story of a cotton sack that was given to a 9-year-old soon to be sold. Upon hearing that her daughter would be sold, Rose put a few things in the sack and told her daughter, Ashley, "It be filled with my love always." 

All That She Carried, by Miles, is definitely on my reading list. 

And speaking of reading, I've been reading A Place for Us for a very long time. I started reading it in late June. At some point, The Vanishing Half became available at the library and I put aside A Place for Us and it was very hard to get back into it after reading The Vanishing Half. I wondered whether to give up on it and move on but something about the book has held my attention. 

30 Days Hath September or Month-End Review

My replacement Fitbit met an untimely demise and I felt like such a prima donna replacing it but I did. Decided to go with a Garmin Vivofit 2. The Fitbit and Vivofit are similarly matched. I like that you can recharge the Fitbit but I was really drawn to the waterproofness of the Vivofit.

Hit the pool for the first time with the new tracker and was a little disappointed that it hardly registered movement. Of course, the youngin' who hopped in my lane and swam circles around me would probably attribute the lack of detection to my speed.

When I first put the Vivofit on, thought that it was broken since it doesn't register movement as fast as the Fitbit but what I really like about the GV2 is the red bar of shame that appears if you don't move for a while. You also get beeped at. Actually, it's more like a pleasant chirp. It's not loud but the message is clear and, note to self: take the Vivo off when practicing yoga.

I am pleased with my activity this month. Sure, I could be bummed that I didn't get in more yoga for National Yoga Month but when I did practice yoga, it was spectacular.

Walked to work today and listened to Finding God In All The Wrong People, a sweet Fresh Air podcast. Hope that you were pleased with September too...

From Today's Walk

Bicycling, 4 x's

Climbing, 4 x's

Dance It Off & firm up!
*Rock It!, 2 x's

Dreadmill, 1 x

Ellen Barrett Live: fusion floor workout, 1 x

Just Walk: mix + match walk blasters
*Short + Sweaty, 1 x

Just Walk: The Tone Every Zone Walk
*Circuit 1, Upper Body, 1 x

KnockOut Body
*Knockout Body Blast, 2 x's

Mowing of the Lawn, 2 x's

Swimming, 5 x's

Walking, 15 x's

Red Line of Shame

Yoga, 6 x's

Photo Credit: Official Yoga Buzz Photographer, Union Station

Zumba, 3 x's

Pausing Between Flights

Got a summons to report for jury duty in August but asked for a deferment and, of course, I had to report on the coldest day of the year.

On Monday, sat until I couldn't sit anymore and just as I got up to walk around, this woman did too and she started stretching. It took everything in me not to start doing yoga.

Had to report this morning at 9 and there was not a peep from the overhead system for two hours. Read a chapter of Open Heart then walked while listening to Fresh Air's With Age, Joan Rivers Learned To Say Anything: 'It Has Freed Me Totally'.

Had forgotten how much I used to love Joan Rivers. Asked for a ticket to one of her shows when I was a teenager. 

Rivers said that her parents didn't like her then joked My mother wanted to have an abortion up until I was nine.

Didn't realize that Rivers really wanted to be an actress and she took a comedy gig because at, $8 an hour, it paid better than a temp job. Fresh Air played footage from a show when Rivers got upset with an audience member and Rivers goes on to talk about how long it took to get the audience back.  I fight to the end she said about trying to entertain her audience...

Finally got called for a panel and once we were all accounted for, lunch followed. Went to this restaurant that I've never been to before and got a chickpea burger. Climbed six flights to get back to the courtroom. Haven't done significant stair climbing in a while. Let's just say that I had to pause between flights.

Chickpea Lemon & Basil Patty...Kale...

We almost made it through the Voir dire process but not quite. 

The Experimental Shirt

Alison told me about one of her projects which involved dyeing white shirts for yoga. In turn, I told her about my frustration with finding yoga attire.

There's nothing like thinking that you found the perfect shirt comprised of a nice tri-blend only to discover that it hikes up and down and won't stay put.

I've since read such a simple tip from curvyyoga.com -- go right ahead and do a downward facing dog in the dressing room. Why didn't I think about that?

Alison also told me that she wears a yoga top underneath another top. I have passed by those little sleeveless yoga tops so many times because I knew that I would never wear them to class.

I own a sleeveless, racerback Oiselle shirt that I got via a MizFit giveaway so I tried it out this morning underneath a very cool dri-wick situation that I got from Old Navy. I felt better with the shirt underneath but I did get warm.

The Experiment

On another yoga note, I'm totally on board with the whole idea that people who arrive late to yoga might just need the class the most but please take care of your velcro situation before you enter when class is in progress. As The Honest Toddler would say ridikilus...

As Alison and I exited the gym, I saw the First Couple of Yoga on rowers. What?! The gym has new rowers. That's a machine that I can get on board with...

After yoga, went for a walk because it was about 57 degrees and it's supposed to be in the teens tomorrow. Listened to this Fresh Air podcast Fear of Fainting, Flight and Cheese: One Man's Age of Anxiety -- an interview with Scott Stossel about his new book My Age of Anxiety: Fear, Hope, Dread and the Search for Peace of Mind. Very interesting -- especially when he said that there is a large genetic component to one's temperament.

I think one of the reasons that I'm pretty unshakable is that a lot of my folks are -- if you don't count the time when I was little and scared to sleep in my own room or the time when I was on Grand Jury duty for three months. I think GJ would shake anyone up. There was one day a week devoted to sexual assault and domestic violence, ugh...

Stossel also emphasized that genes are not destiny. I also believe that he said that meditation can reduce the size of the amygdala.

According to Science Daily:

Conditions such as anxiety, autism, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder, and phobias are suspected of being linked to abnormal functioning of the amygdala...

Another good point that Stossel makes: There are multiple ways to build resilience.

P.S. There are times when I wish that I had a fear of cheese.