Sour Cream Is Good With Everything or Even More Stuff People Say To Me

I’m gaining weight but it’s not a problem; I’ve given up on the losing weight thing.

Colleague on the difficulty of getting to the gym during the week because of late nights at work.

I could never swim like that; I would drown.

A woman to me after I did the front crawl.

Your calves seem more developed.

Massage therapist

That is my worst nightmare.

Friend at work when I mentioned outdoor climbing

Sour cream is good with everything.

My colleague who mixed two bananas with sour cream, a little sugar and heavy cream.

Patti: I never go for that hold. It's a red herring even though it's pink.

Me: Huhhuhuh...

Me: So, was it love at first sight?

Pam: With climbing, yes.

(As opposed to love at first sight with her husband)

My aunt Debbie: What are you up to today?

Me: I'm going to this boxing class.

Aunt: (Enthusiastic chuckling) Girl, you're always up to something.

Me to Lifeguard: Is the water cold?

Karen (woman sitting on edge of pool): My foot is numb.

MT: How are you doing physically and emotionally?

Me: Oh, don't start what you don't have time to finish.

MT: I have time...

Me: I'm fine.

MT: You know what fine means? F.....Up, Insecure, Neurotic, Emotional...

Me:...I'm fine (unintentional).