Monday, December 11, 2017

The Release

Before I headed to a restorative yoga class at work last Wednesday, I explained something to a super frustrated colleague. When I realized her level of despair, I mentioned the yoga class but she told me that it was at work with work people and she wouldn't be able to relax. I get that.

On Friday, we had our holiday party and I won a $100 dollar gift card to a Thai restaurant. There was also a cake walk and when I went to the stage, one of my colleagues said Haven't you won enough already?, LOL. I only went to the stage because they needed more participants. I need a whole cake like I need another hole in my head.

Went to the 'Fugee's on Friday and she made me a smoothie -- the same color as my juice that I've been getting. Not sure why but I started laughing which escalated into shrieks and I couldn't stop for quite a while. Seriously, I lost control -- guess I needed the release. 

At any rate, the concoction was very tasty. Thank you, 'Fugee...

Had weird dreams last night, including one that was set in a jail but I'm about 99% sure that came from watching Empire

I'm doing a meditation "challenge" right now. I'm on day two which really resonated with me. I've added it to my  iPod and will definitely listen to it again.

I am on a mission to get you to meditate. So, here’s a challenge: 7 days for 5 minutes each day. You can do this, and it could just shift your life in a sweet and powerful way. There is no shortage of evidence on the efficacy of meditation physically, emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually. Does this sound familiar? “I really should meditate, but I don’t know how to.” “I really should meditate, but my mind is all over the place.” “I really should meditate, but I don’t have time.” “I really should meditate, but I can’t sit still.” “I really should meditate, but I need some guidance.” The excuses go on and on. The truth is that you CAN meditate - and this is the community to offer support and accountability. I am even willing to bribe you with some swag if you finish the challenge and bring friends with you. I’ve created a free (and downloadable!) 5 min. guided meditation for each of the next seven days - Day One is already up on my website. Just complete the 3 steps below to have a chance to win some giveaways (shown in photos above - swipe left!), or complete the challenge simply for your own benefit. Just meditate!!! More info below. ๐Ÿ˜Š TO PARTICIPATE: 1) Follow me, if you’re not already! Then TAG A FRIEND on this post. 2) Head over to my website at (link in my Bio as well). Listen to the new five minute meditation available on each of the seven days. Feel free to download for future use! 3) Check-in on my website each day - takes only a few seconds (check-in is directly below meditations on the web page). Steps 1-3 must be completed all seven days to enter. (I’ll be checking! ๐Ÿ˜‰) Share/repost my photo for 2 additional entries. Hashtag #whywaitchallenge. Must be following @colleensaidman. Must tag friend in comments. There will be multiple swag bags sent out! Includes: Yoga Shanti water bottle and tank (sizes S/M/L), yoga DVD, Yoga For Life book, and one Young Living Essential oil. Winners selected at random and contacted through DM or email on December 18th. MUST BE IN CONTINENTAL USA. All others are still welcome (and encouraged) to participate! ✨๐Ÿ™๐Ÿฝ #whywaitchallenge #challenge #giveaway #yoga #meditation
A post shared by ๐Ÿ’œ Colleen Saidman Yee (@colleensaidman) on

Tuesday, December 5, 2017

Feels Right

Post-Zumba on Saturday, I asked Alison to stop at the local herb shop before we headed for coffee. The shop was having an annual holiday sale but I didn't realize that it was also their annual holiday party and I'm still thinking about the Chickpea and Spinach Curry (with sprouted rice) and the gluten-free brownies that I ate.

From the shop, we headed to the Mystic place where I can never resist buying something. Recently saw a massage therapist on Instagram touting Chinese Therapy Balls so, of course, I had to buy a pair...

Kept looking at the sky during the weekend because I was captivated with the moon. It was stunning and I tried to capture pictures with not much luck.

Actually like this one.
Went to an awesome yin yoga class tonight. Almost stayed at home but so glad that I didn't. This is my second time in this teacher's class and I can see why people tell you to find the teacher that feels right to you...

Re: the super moon, I also like this 'gram.

Moon of all moons, there are times when a specially big moon rises in the sky. On December 3, we heard that a Super Moon was going to appear. Our expectation of seeing it from the Korean land after many decades was bigger than the moon itself. But the weather was bad... ๐Ÿ˜ž When you guys called us saying you saw a faint moon on your way back home from our place, I remembered an old song I learned in the elementary school. “Moon, moon, what moon? Round moon like a plate. Where, where, did it rise? It rose above the Nam mountain.” #moon #supermoon #drawing #watercolor A lua das luas, tem dias que a lua nasce especialmente grande. Quando soube que na noite do dia 3 o "super moon" aparecia e eu poderia revรช-lo depois de dรฉcadas aqui nos cรฉus da Coreia, o tamanho da minha expectativa talvez fosse maior que a prรณpria lua. Mas o tempo estava fechado ใ… ใ…  ... Naquele dia, quando vocรชs vieram nos visitar em casa e no caminho de volta me ligaram dizendo que conseguiram ver a lua mesmo que embaรงado, lembrei de uma velha canรงรฃo que aprendi assim que entrei na escolinha. "Lua lua que tipo de lua, lua redonda como bandeja. Onde ela estรก? No topo da montanha Namsan." ๋‹ฌ ์ค‘์˜ ๋‹ฌ, ํŠน๋ณ„ํžˆ ํฐ ๋‹ฌ์ด ๋œฐ ๋•Œ๊ฐ€ ์žˆ์ง€. ์ง€๋‚œ 3์ผ ๋ฐค์— ์Šˆํผ ๋ฌธ์ด ๋œฌ๋‹ค๊ณ  ํ•˜๊ธธ๋ž˜ ๋ช‡ ์‹ญ๋…„๋งŒ์— ํ•œ๊ตญ ๋•…์—์„œ ๋ณด๊ฒ ๊ตฌ๋‚˜ ๊ธฐ๋Œ€๊ฐ€ ์ •๋ง ๋‹ฌ๋ณด๋‹ค ์ปธ์—ˆ์–ด. ๊ทธ๋Ÿฐ๋ฐ ๋‚ ์”จ๊ฐ€ ๋‚˜๋นด์ง€. ใ… ใ… ใ… ... ๋„ˆํฌ๊ฐ€ ํ• ์•„๋ฒ„์ง€๋„ค ์™”๋‹ค๊ฐ€ ๋Œ์•„๊ฐ€๋Š” ๊ธธ์— ๊ทธ๋ž˜๋„ ํฌ๋ฏธํ•˜๊ฒŒ๋‚˜๋งˆ ๋‹ฌ์„ ๋ดค๋‹ค๋Š” ์ „ํ™”๋ฅผ ๋ฐ›๊ณ  ์ดˆ๋“ฑํ•™๊ต ๋“ค์–ด๊ฐ€์ž ๋ฐฐ์šด ์˜›๋‚  ๋…ธ๋ž˜๊ฐ€ ์ƒ๊ฐ๋‚ฌ๋‹ค. '๋‹ฌ ๋‹ฌ ๋ฌด์Šจ ๋‹ฌ ์Ÿ๋ฐ˜๊ฐ™์ด ๋‘ฅ๊ทผ ๋‹ฌ ์–ด๋””์–ด๋”” ๋–ด๋‚˜ ๋‚จ์‚ฐ ์œ„์— ๋–ด์ง€’ #ํ• ์•„๋ฒ„์ง€ํšŒ์ƒ # ์Šˆํผ๋ฌธ #์ˆ˜์ฑ„ํ™” #๋ณด๋ฆ„๋‹ฌ
A post shared by Grandpa Chan (@drawings_for_my_grandchildren) on

Tuesday, November 28, 2017

Right Now

Padded Thanksgiving with extra days since I was feeling agitated. Those PTO days feel so precious that I want to save them but feeling really agitated is a good reason to take time off from work. Of course, there's a limit to what PTO is able to solve...

Went to another community sound meditation last night and, toward the end, I thought That is so delightful. The sound healing therapist incorporated bells and a rain stick. Overall, I'm enjoying the sound meditations and I feel like I sleep better afterward.

As I was getting ready for Zumba this p.m., this woman said that I looked very familiar but we don't know each other. Still, she went on to talk about the 10 pounds that she had gained. While we waited for class to begin, I talked about my sweet tooth and she said Please, I have every tooth. About Zumba, I don't know what I'm doing to which I replied Don't make me laugh

Oh, you're going to laugh, she said. After class, she told me that she had escaped a carjacking and that she was moving out of the city because of that incident and the increase in gunfire. 

In other news, I fixed the Coconut Red Curry Vegetable Soup from the Minimalist Baker's cookbook and I loved it. Feeling like my cooking sessions with Gloria has made me a more adventurous cook.

Also, this rain stick with Tibetan bowls needs to be on my iPod right now.

Monday, November 27, 2017

Turning The Corner

Went to visit my brother along with three other relatives.  Feel like I'm getting much better at packing and knew, right off the bat, that I should be conservative since I was only spending two nights away from home.

Used an overnight bag with a packing cube inside. Still not sure if the cubes are space savers but I do like how you're able to better organize clothing.

Had dreams the two nights that I was away. The first one involved observing a father with his baby, in danger of drowning, in a swimming pool. The father managed to rescue himself but not the baby but I was able to. Once I had the baby in my arms, I wailed.

The next night I dreamed that there were two bad guys in a room and I was confident about taking out one with my weapon but not the other. I shot the one guy and that's where the dream ended. Maybe the latter dream stemmed from being on a military base or watching Covert Affairs or maybe, as Dream Moods suggests, the dream was about experiencing confrontation and feeling victimized...

One of my relatives showed up inebriated and I was definitely disappointed and holding my breath. My mother and her siblings occasionally bickered. My oldest nephew got a kick out of that saying Now I don't feel bad about getting into it with my brothers. Just as people are prone to feel like forever kids around their parents, I guess that it's true of siblings too.

At any rate, I enjoyed seeing my grand nieces who I hadn't seen in years. I was not prepared for them wanting to occupy electronic devices but I will say that the pictures that they took were interesting. I just hoped that they wouldn't drop my expensive iPod or someone else's phone.

Electronic Delight
Went to see my cousin yesterday and, this time, I wasn't surprised when I turned the corner and saw my aunt's house decorated with lights. It's bittersweet seeing the lights but not her.

Projected Lights

Monday, November 20, 2017

Looking for Marie Howe

About a decade ago,  I read a book of poetry about this woman dealing with the loss of her brother.

Knew that the brother had cancer.

Knew that there was a poem about the brother getting a needle stuck in his eye to prevent losing his sight and I remembered a line in one of the poems that read -- He had washed his last dish.

But I didn't know enough to find the book and I thought that I'd never see it again.

↔Fast Forward ↔

I really wanted to read a book about grief but I didn't necessarily want to read an Elizabeth Kubler Ross book or Kerry Egan's On Living. After searching on the internet, I spotted Kevin Young's anthology, The Art of Losing; it has been a great book to slowly read my way through and I didn't have to wait too long (page 69) before I came across a familiar poem, How Some of It Happened, by Marie Howe, the poet that I'd been looking for.

I immediately ordered her book from the library and when I got it, I remembered the maroon cover and everything.

I can't say enough about the Art of Losing. Poems that really hit me in the solar plexus, included:

Sharon Olds' The Race

Ruth Stone's Loss

Elizabeth Alexander's Autumn Passage

Coleman Barks' Luke and the Duct Tape

James Weldon Johnson's  Listen Lord: A Prayer

William Matthews' My Father's Body

Edward Hirsch's Cold Calls

Ted Kooser's Mourners

Ruth L. Schwartz's Letter from God

Jane Kenyon's Otherwise

Mary Oliver's When Death Comes

This book also made me remember other poems about death that really moved me -- like Lucille Clifton's poems about her father and husband; Gloria Wade-Gayles' poem about her mother and Cornelius Eady's book about his father's death.

I am a bit late to the Mary Oliver a game but when I first read her poem Wild Geese, it blew my mind and, I think, more than anything else -- the first line moves me unbelievably and I, occasionally, use it to really center myself.

Wednesday, November 15, 2017


Diffused eucalyptus and lemon essential oils last night and slept decently but woke up with cotton mouth as the post-swimming congestion settled in at some point.

When I talked to one of the guys at the pool last night, he says that anytime he wears his silver ring in the pool, it turns a dark color and he's also noticed that the coins in the vending machine are kind of weird.

At any rate, I battled the congestion with a variety of essential oils and, now, the congestion is gone but I need to cut back on my indoor swimming...

When I went over to my aunt G.'s on Sunday, she gave me her paper. She gets the Illinois paper except for on Sunday when she, erroneously, gets the St. Louis Post Dispatch which she doesn't care for. So,what did I do this morning? I caught up on comic strips and I was drawn to the two below:

A major fire happened today and there's still a plume of smoke. I've been concerned about air quality which made me think about people in war-torn countries and bombs and rubble.

Tuesday, November 14, 2017


Accidental Picture
Went to the pool after a two week hiatus. I was horribly congested after I went last time. Plus, the water is usually chilly and I just wasn't feeling it last week with the cooler temperatures.

Got to the pool around 6:50 p.m. and the lifeguard approached me. The hours had changed and I was about 30 minutes early, ugh.

This guy who often comes to the pool told me that he did the same thing last week and he went on to tell me that he had to swim in a hurry as he usually drops his wife off at the thrift store then picks her up when he's finished swimming. He went on to tell me that they both lost a lot of weight years ago and couldn't afford to keep buying clothes and that's when they first started shopping at thrift stores. I told him that I have a friend ( the 'Fugee) who has the patience to shop at such stores.

Another guy who I last saw in May is back at the pool and he told me that he had lost 28 pounds over the summer. He wasn't a heavy guy to begin with but I guess he was heavier than he wanted to be.

His secret? He cut his lunch in half and now he cuts a subway sandwich into five parts and eats it for dinner. Yes, he's on the "Jared Diet." When I asked him about breakfast, he said that he sleeps in late and has never been much of a breakfast person.

It's kind of funny that neither one of these guys has talked to me about weight before and that was tonight's topic.