Monday, August 14, 2017

Out in the Open

Someone sent me an email at work and I only read the first part of their sentence. The person ended up calling me because they needed a quick response. I love to read so I don't know why I'm quickly scanning stuff. I will concede that there is work-related stuff that I, obviously, don't want to read but... At any rate, I ended up having a conversation with the person about meditation and she said that we all need uncluttering for our minds. I like that concept and want to put meditation back on my agenda. She also sent me the "mantra" that she keeps above her desk.

Last week was a busy one. Went to Zumba -- twice, climbing and swimming (twice). Had dinner with Gloria on Thursday then we went to see Garden of Glass at the Botanical Garden. On Friday, went over to the 'Fugee's and, on Saturday, mowed the lawn and went to say my goodbyes to the city pool even though it was only 82 degrees. At the pool, talked for 30 minutes to a yogi whose path I seldom cross at the studio. At some point, also went to JC Penney because I'd gotten a spend $10 dollars, get $10 dollars off coupon and I've been looking for another short sleeve shirt to wear to work. Mission accomplished.

New Shirt
While running errands, debated about whether to go to this silent yoga event. Wasn't sure when an event of this kind would happen again so I went.

I am having time management issues. My problem? There are a lot of things that I like to do but, obviously, something suffers. I wanted to go to the city pool again on Sunday for the final day but ended up running out of time. While I got around to cooking, never did get around to washing clothes or the other chores that needed to be done.

Really enjoyed the silent, sunset yoga that took place at the gorgeous Grand Basin in Forest Park but, like a fugitive, I was very aware of how out in the open I was and even more so because the people who sponsored the yoga event are really into photography. One of them was taking very up close and personal pictures. At one point, I doubled the blanket that I had for my knees and thought she would move on as I adjusted it but, no, she stayed right where she was and got her picture. My God, I thought, she is going to capture all the flaws. I can take a gazillion selfies and post the one that I think is most flattering but I cannot control what other people post.

A Woman Chilling Out Before Yoga

Still in fugitive mode, I looked for pictures from the event and held my breath as I spotted my likeness in people's social media pictures. Also wondered how intrusive I was capturing the photo above of the woman resting before yoga.

While at the Botanical Garden, Gloria kept asking which installation was my favorite. She also asked me if I could do anything, work-wise, what it would be. As we walked about, I couldn't pinpoint a favorite glass sculpture until we'd left the Climatron and headed to the exit. I'm glad that I didn't read the map or descriptions of the artwork because I got to be blown away by Make A Wish when I figured out what was happening. It was such a moment of delight and maybe I'll get to have a similar moment when I figure out what work really rocks my boat.

Love this Chihuly in the foyer at the MO Botanical Garden.

Gloria and moi at the exhibit...

Make A Wish
This Words of Women Instagram post resonated with  me today.

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Monday, August 7, 2017

Outside Factors

Was on Instagram and saw a post about yoga at this former church which is being slowly restored and currently in use as a skate park.

Photo shoot in progress...
Not sure why I feel the need to practice in different spaces but I do and the 11:00 a.m. start time was also nice for a Sunday morning. Alison said that she was bummed about missing yoga there the last time it was offered so she met me there.

Gotta say that I was surprised when I heard a thunderous noise behind me. I didn't expect skating to go on at the same time as yoga but most teachers would say use the noise as an opportunity to practice going deeper etc. despite outside factors. At any rate, my body needed the yoga. It felt better but still feels wrecked especially after Zumba this evening...

One of the receptionists at work called me to say that I had a delivery.  I was super puzzled as I have no anniversaries etc. and just hoped it wasn't a subpoena or something. The delivery was two boxes of hot cookies.

One of our sister agencies had come to get Intel and the cookies were a thank you. I didn't eat any but it was very hard not to.

Saturday, August 5, 2017


As I left the laundromat, thought I haven't done shit today but, in actuality, I had.

Left my house around 9:45 a.m. to rendezvous with Alison on the riverfront trail for bicycling. It was close to 1:00 p.m. when we left. I also did some reading. I'm on the wait list for several books and I'm reading Heather Poole's Cruising Altitude. Since I have a major case of wanderlust right now, it's a good book for me.

The week was eventful as well.

Zumba on Monday and again on Wednesday with a pre-show of outdoor yoga. There were four things (climbing, yoga, Zumba and swimming) that I wanted to do but, of course, there was no way that I could or should do them all.

Ballpark Village Yoga Series, Photo Credit: Tammy
On Thursday, had dinner with Gloria and, on Friday, I was completely knackered.

Since it's cool-ish, took a bath to try to suss out the soreness in my body. Keeping my fingers crossed...

Sunday, July 30, 2017

Back and Forth

Alison and I went back and forth about what activity to do on Saturday. I woke up exhausted so ixnay on any possible plans to bicycle. We ended up going to Zumba and I barely made it through the hour but I was not the only one who reported feelings of exhaustion. Something in the air or collective tiredness?

From Zumba, Alison and I went to the opening of a new yoga studio. I was also joining Rosie there. Rosie and I moved on to have lunch at Frida's and even though I know it wasn't a wise thing to do, I went to Trader Joe's in the middle of the day because I was in the area. Trader Joe's wasn't bad but the parking lot was and usually is awful because of PetSmart, World Market, Target, Five Below and every other imaginable store.

Chillaxed a bit then cut the grass because, finally, the heat was not a factor or excuse...

Alison and I got a bike ride in today. We went to a new (to us) trail that was nice and flat and not crowded. Hadn't been bicycling in so long that my tires looked visibly flat so there was the exercise before the bike ride of pumping air into the tires.

After biking I went to Target and the grocery store, drank coffee then cooked and washed the dishes. Went back outside to trim down a small portion of weeds. I'm feeling outnumbered (mixed with bit of ugh) by the tasks that I need to do and then I saw this post...

Today is 29 days into finding out about the Mucosal Melanoma cancer spread.  I completed my second treatment yesterday and I'm visualizing this cancer being GONE. I've lost close to 30 pounds as we still struggle with nausea and pain, but it's in better control than two weeks ago. They placed a drain tube in my stomach so that the fluid build up and draining is more controlled.  We have palliative care nursing coming to the house so we have local in home support for pain management. I am pretty weak, unable to walk unassisted and am almost 100% dependent on my husband and Chase to help with everything.  This has been the hardest for us as a family. We are done trying to make sense out of this and we've switched gears to looking this monster in the face. Most days I spend in bed resting, taking meds, sleeping, trying to eat and just trying to keep focused on my new fight.  Chris, the kids and I are so very thankful for every prayer, comment, wish, etc. Thank you for the meals, the cards, gifts. Thank you to our Mom's who have dropped their lives to help. To my boss and staff, who have been so supportive. We will continue to draw strength from all of you.  To all of you, please do one thing for me right this minute. Look around, count your blessings, be thankful for your health, freedom and ability to enjoy your summer. It can be snagged in an instant, and I just want you all to give yourself that gift.  Love to you.❤
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Friday, July 28, 2017


Think that Gloria is trying to convert me to veganism and it's going to work if she keeps cooking delicious meals and sending me home with food.

For the Eyes...

Taco Stands, Jackfruit, Homemade Salsa etc.

Didn't exercise yesterday because of my dinner date with Gloria but I doubled up on Wednesday so that counts, right?

Leftovers, All Together

Asked one of my coworkers, who often flutters his lips in exasperation, What's up or rather what's not up? His response --  My enthusiasm. My sentiment exactly as far as 9 to 5 life is concerned.

Was on Twitter and saw a post from one of the local yoga studios about donation yoga in the park and, just like that, my Friday evening plans were cemented.

Yoga was a good way to recuperate from the week plus a good way to take my fretting down a notch as I try to figure out how to juggle weekend tasks.

Perfect P.M. Weather
Someone tweeted that, with this current administration, it feels like waking up to a fire alarm every morning and then I saw the tweet below,  a nice break from all the other hellish things going on in the world:

Tuesday, July 25, 2017

Pace Yourself

Walked for exercise and kept my yoga plan even though I also had my eyes on the outdoor pool. Wanted to keep my date with yoga since I've only been going once a week and I know how important it is for my body and mind.

Got to the studio and realized that the regular teacher wouldn't be there even though there was no "sub alert" on the website. There was no issue, though, because I really like the teacher who subbed and she only does gentle yoga. But what is about a sub that's unsettling?

She (Lizzie) asked if there were any questions then she gave us a little yoga preamble about what type of class it would be  since it was a p.m. practice then she said that she would help us sleep well tonight. OMG, I had forgotten how relaxing Lizzie's classes are. At the end, I was straight up staggering and thought It's a relaxation technical knockout.

I liked it when Lizzie said Go at a pace that allows you to remain present. I need to make a mental note about pace because it's such a nice yoga goal...

Went for a walk on Sunday too and listened to the episode of Death, Sex & Money featuring Gabourey Sidibe. I'm impressed with how fast Sidibe can swim a lap and what she revealed about her mother's career made me a little sad.

One of my colleagues said that she dreamed, last night, that it was Friday and was so disturbed when she woke up and realized it was Tuesday. Yeah, I've had dreams like that too...

Saturday, July 22, 2017

Not Alone

Went to Zumba this morning and I'm not sure why I was surprised that Alisha made us rain. She has always been energetic -- even when fully pregnant.

Returned home after Zumba and wasn't sure what to do with myself outside of washing clothes. Eventually pulled myself together and went to the pool so I could alleviate my cabin fever.

You know that it's hot when you're warm while in the pool. When I got back home, realized how good it feels to be unplugged and, of course, I should never underestimate aquatic therapy. I felt less "woe is me" after returning. Having just the weekend to recuperate and get stuff done tends to make me gloomy and I know that I'm not the only one who experiences this soooo...

Went to run an errand around 8-ish and the temperature was still registering over 100 degrees. Listened to the Jill Scott CD that I randomly picked up when I went to retrieve The Wangs vs. the World from the library. I really like tracks five, six (Lovely Day) and ten. Had to give Scott's remake of Lovely Day a couple of listens before I stopped making comparisons to the original.

On the way back from my errand, enjoyed sky-gazing and wondered if the indigo clouds were heat-related.