Mile-stone

I saw the telltale black swimming suit and black goggles and knew it was Chatty Kathleen. Someone was in the lane next to me but, apparently, not even a lane can keep us apart.

Kathleen: Can you swim and talk?

Me: Shaking my head then no.

Kathleen wanted to talk but she also saw me holding on to the edge of the pool. She advised me to keep my arms level with my shoulders then move my hands as if I was pushing sand aside.

I had actually practiced treading for a bit before she arrived and it seemed easier. Floating seems easier too; I feel as if I could do it forever. What is it about catching on to front crawl breathing that has made me more buoyant?

The most laps that I've done is 28 and, lately, I've been doing 20 or 21 and I wanted to gradually work my way up to a mile. When I was in a WOW (Women on Weights) class, the instructor said that you should gradually increase your weights.

I thought screw it. I'm always paying attention to rules and whatnot. I had the perfect opportunity. There were only five people at the pool and I didn't have to share a lane. I thought about Bob Harper saying stand up and finish what you started.

It took me almost two hours but I did it. I swam my first mile. I'm exhausted as all get out but I feel good about what I accomplished in the water -- 33 laps or 66 lengths or 1650 yards.

A Whole New Swimming World

The pieces have been gradually falling into place but something finally clicked. I did 21 laps and they were, by far, the best laps that I've ever done. For the most part, I get front crawl breathing. I had a few times were I sputtered towards the end of the lane but that was about it. I feel so much more comfortable.

I've been trying to breathe so carefully and so deliberately and, really, the breathing is not as exaggerated as I imagined. Just a simple lifting of the head and your body (being the miraculous entity that it is) just takes the oxygen that it needs.

I've wondered how people do lap after lap of the front crawl and I fought so hard to do just one lap -- trying to calm myself and rest before I ventured out and stuck my head under the water. I wondered how Jessica could fly down the lane and why Dana looked at me as if I were crazy when she asked Are you having trouble with breathing?

I've been overthinking it people. Overthinking it way too much. I made a mountain out of a molehill.

Ironically, chatty Kathleen was at the pool and I haven't seen her in ages. Serendipity. Circles. I find all of it amazing.

The reason I even signed up for a YouTube account is because there was this one video that captured Olympians breathing underwater. I got tired of searching for it and once I signed up for a Tube account, I didn't have to search anymore.


I kept thinking of this Edward M. Forster quote:

Spoon feeding in the long run teaches us nothing but the shape of the spoon.

I've been teaching myself the shape of the spoon and I've been coloring in between the lines.

I feel like my accomplishment today has opened up a whole new swimming world. Now, I just need to work on treading. I will not overthink it but I won't promise not to look at any videos because I've already watched quite a few and I know where to find them because they're in my YouTube favorites.

Holding On

The shoulder situation made a comeback and I've been treating it with massage therapy but a funny thing would happen on the way to massage therapy: the pain, discomfort and soreness (from exercise) would just about disappear.

The second time the pain disappeared prior to my appointment, I figured something psychological might be going on.

The day after the last massage that I had the discomfort, which had already switched sides of the shoulder, returned to my upper right arm, my shoulder blade and sometimes on the side of my neck. The shoulder blade situation felt like a tight little radius of intensity and heat with a kink right in the middle.

My friend (HC), her sister and I went to Community Acupuncture's open house today. After treatment, my friend asked me what I thought.

Me: It is what it is...

That's when I realized I was in a foul mood and stressed-out.

I have been feeling stuck and there is little wonder that my muscles are in a holding pattern.

I'm frustrated with rock climbing no matter what my belay partners tell me about my tenacity and strength.

I'm frustrated with front crawl breathing even though I've been told that everyone struggles with it.

I'm frustrated that I seem unable to lose more weight. One year plateau anyone?

I have angst about my new body and I didn't see that one coming.

I may have fitness fatigue.

And my face? Even it looks strange after weight loss.


While I was waiting on my friend and her sister to finish up their acupuncture sessions, I read through The Asian Diet book and one of the things it said about stress is that your body holds on to weight. Imagine that...

A few weeks ago, I was talking to my friend Lori and I was reluctant to vent. I told her that I sounded ungrateful and she told me that I wasn't being ungrateful; I was just expressing how I feel.

I also have a tendency to not want to own up to sadness etc. because, in the back of mind, I feel as if things might get worse if I vent. Not sure where I got that idea from and, having said that, turning the calendar page from August to September made me sad. I even took the calendar off the wall for a while.

I went rock climbing yesterday and swimming today. Clearly, if I had a serious shoulder injury, I would not have been able to climb or swim.

Just acknowledging, though, that I haven't been feeling cheery has taken some of the weight off my shoulders. I'm sure that floating helped too...


Postscript: Since I'm getting stuff off my shoulders, even though I swim laps, my treading bites and I am not wholly comfortable with the deep end.