Showing posts with label Quiet. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Quiet. Show all posts

Monday, April 25, 2011

The Gospel According to Melinda Frances

The gospel without preamble:


  • It’s just so quiet; it stresses me out.



  • Once the pool opens, I can swim, tan and drink.



  • Kids stress me out; they make too much noise.



  • M: I don't want to be pregnant.

    Me: Okay Jillian Michaels.

    M: Who's Jillian Michaels?



  • I want to be besties with Paris Hilton and Michelle Obama.



  • Whatever happened to being a classy lady?



  • They called me "The Hot Mess Express" in college.



  • M: I want to open a restaurant called "Street Food." I shouldn't have to go to Prague to get a fried cheese sandwich.

    Me: You can make your own fried cheese.

    M: I can make my own burrito but I still like to go to Qdoba.



  • Melinda: I was supposed to be named Veronica and I think I would have made a good one.

    Me: What do you think are the qualities of a Veronica?

    Melinda: Sassy...fun...



  • Me: Is she nuttier than a fruitcake?

    Melinda: Mmmmmm, cake.