Every Woman Should Know How to Clean

I'm many things but I'm not really an a.m. exerciser but since my exercise schedule is getting complicated, I dragged myself out of bed and headed to Kettlebell 101 because I didn't want more time to elapse between classes. I made it to class in the nick of time.

After the last encounter with kettlebells, I thought my upper body would be sore. Not.

I cannot fully describe how sore my hamstrings were. I took at least two Epsom Salt baths, a yoga class, did self-massage and hamstring-specific stretches but the 'strings remained sore for almost four days...

For today's warm-up, we ran around the small room, rotated our arms while running, shuffled to the side, skipped and ran backwards. I was so happy when we started doing stretches. The stretching portion included but was not limited to a figure eight with our arms; my mind/body connection is so challenged when we're supposed to reverse the figure eight. We did this one stretch where you cross one leg over the other with the feet right next to each other then bend at the waist. Mike was impressed that we could all bend post-Thanksgiving.

After the warm-up, we did swings, one arm swings, the press, catch and lunge, rows, around-the-body with a catch, push-ups etc. After this series, Mike took us three newbies to the side to work on the clean while the bigger group did Turkish Get-Ups et al.

Did you know that you're leaking power if you don't properly rack the kettlebell on your biceps and forearm during the clean? I didn't.

It helped when Mike said that the motion for the clean is like zipping up a jacket. I kept making a popping sound when racking my kettlebell. Mike said it was because I was strong* and kind of flinging the kettlebell (10kg) up but he said it's a lot to learn and we'll just chalk everything up to kettlebell practice.

Things I need to remember:

Hand Off Body (During One Arm Swing)

It's Not A Squat Stance

Squeeze the Butt

Thumb Back

Don't Try to Control the Kettlebell (During Swings)...

I was a mess when I tried to swing and clean. Mike was like don't overthink it. How did he know that I'm prone to overthinking?

Even though Mike was joking, he is right: every woman should know how to clean.





*Other people keep telling me that I'm strong. I'm not sure why I need to keep convincing myself. In addition, when I shuffled past the mirror, I noticed that I am more toned even though I've been thinking otherwise.

Train of Thought

Oh, quads are sore...It's a nice night for an Epsom Salt bath...I should get... Oh, the library...Yes, it stays open until 7...I can get that book, Postcards from a Dead Girl, that Dawn recommended....


BodyGo Row Class Agenda

Before the agenda was taken care of, Laurie made sure that everyone knew each other or had been introduced. I sometimes behave like a troglodyte but not Jaime who took the initiative and introduced herself in the lobby.

Once the intros were taken care of, we warmed up by doing reverse lunges et al. then the rowing games began.


Two Minutes of Rowing
"Pick Your Poison"
Rowing
"Poison Picking"
Rowing
"Poison Picking"...Repeat


Poison to Pick From:

Planks to Push-Ups (20 x's)
Plyo Push-Ups (20)
Push-Ups (20)
Single Arm DB Thrusters (20)
Sit-Ups (30)
Straight Leg Raises or Tucks (at Dip Station) (25)
Squats (20)...


So far, Postcards from a Dead Girl is good. What's even better is that I didn't drop it in the tub because book dropping has happened before.

A Benchmark Is Still A Benchmark or CrossFit Basic Training, The Final Class

I had mixed emotions as I faced my last CrossFit basics class and really can't believe the end came so quick. I checked out benchmark workouts and there were only a couple that us newbies would be able to take on. I didn't know how it was going to be administered but I prepared, nervously, to get my behind kicked.

I briefly chit chatted with Michelle earlier in the day and said that Laurie was going to kill us tonight and the boot was not going to stop her. Michelle agreed that the boot doesn't hold Laurie back...

The six of us walk into the gym and there's Laurie and Libbie and someone that I don't know. I do not like onlookers but relaxed once I found out that it was Laurie's daughter who was going to help with equipment because of her mother's limited mobility.

We warmed up on rowing machines Tabata-style. Twenty seconds of rowing, ten seconds of rest. Repeat.

Next up, hollow PVC pipes for warming up the shoulders and practicing the snatch. A considerable amount of time is spent on snatch technique and, to really get a feel for the snatch, we practice with dumbbells. Next up, the ab mat. We're introduced to some piece of equipment where you can do a full body extension to work your abs. Completely forgot the name of the machine which they won't let you touch until you get more experience under your belt.

Libbie wants to also show us burpees. What's a burpee? Carol asks.

Me: I hate burpees...

I look at the clock and think there's no way that we have time for a benchmark workout. No way. We're almost 45 minutes into a 60 minute class. I was wrong. It's not a benchmark workout but a baseline chipper. Whatever, a rose is still a rose... I repeatedly scanned the board that the chipper was written on as I wrapped mind around the workout.

10 Burpees (Modified)

10 Pull-Ups (Jumping from a Box)

20 Box Jumps

20 KB Swings (25 pounds, Russian version)

30 Sit-ups

30 Slams (14 pounds)

40 Jump Ropes (Singles)

40 Prisoner Lunges

I've been working on my abs and, as a result, I took care of the sit-ups without much drama. In fact, I kind of enjoyed the experience. I also went right through the rope jumping and was much better at the kettlebell swing. After Mich mentioned the hip action, I watched a video on YouTube and a light bulb went off. The prisoner lunges owned me.

Michelle and I gutted out the prisoner lunges together. She finished right before I did and I finished last and collapsed near a fan. Laurie's daughter was kind enough to position the fan so that I could get the full effect.

I was hoping that I would have my answer about joining CrossFit but I don't. I do think that it is what I need right now and it was very satisfying making it though the baseline chipper but I am concerned about walking into a class with seasoned CrossFitters like, say, Libbie who took care of a 50 pound dumbbell demonstrating the snatch. Wish there were a step-up, freshman kind of class.

After I got up off the floor, Laurie's daughter hopped up on the pull-up bar and hung there. I don't do this kind of stuff, she said quietly...

And how long did it take me to finish the baseline chipper? 12:35. Some of that time, LOL, was spent bent over while breathing heavily. And the Epsom Salt bath? Already a done deal.

Off Your Knees or CrossFit Basic Training, Round 2

Five of us gathered in the lobby before class and we all had the same question: Are you sore?

Two of us were still sore post-yoga and Epsom Salt. Seeing that I was still walking down the stairs sideways, I had no idea how I was going to negotiate round two.

Instead of Leeny and Libbie, it's Leeny and Laurie running things for round two...

Warm-Up

30 seconds of stepping up on a rather industrial-size box

30 seconds of the Russian Step Up (one leg remaining on box while the other touches the ground then knee up)

30 seconds of jumping jacks

30 seconds of Russian Step Up with other leg

30 seconds of criss cross jumping jacks

30 seconds of mountain climbers

shoulder rotations...then super planks

plank jacks

We do pull-ups with human-size rubber bands and we practice on the rings which are not so friendly the second time around; rings dips are crazy.

How do you do a deadlift? Glad you asked. Make sure your shoestrings are under the bar, get the bar next to your shins, butt out, chest out, stare at the logo on the wall and, if you're me, Laurie's gonna correct your sorry form. My problem might have started with the lack of shoestrings.



During swings, I get more of Laurie's attention. I'm gonna get you a towel. She also gets me a 25 pound kettlebell because, apparently, I wildly swung the 20 pound one. She loops the towel through the kettlebell (a technique she uses with men) and I try to practice better form. I swing the 25 pounder and the momentum almost carries me back which prompts one of my classmates to mock cough and say Epsom Salt...

18...15...12...Time Priority

18 Swings

18 Push-Ups

18 Slams

15 Swings

15 Push-Ups

15 Slams

12 Swings

12 Push-Ups

12 Slams

Before we start on 18...15...12, we discuss logistics. A classmate wants to know if we get tired, can we switch to doing knee-style push-ups and Laurie quickly said:

I don't let people do them on their knees. If someone does push-ups on their knees, that means they've been doing it that way their whole life.

Apparently, Laurie wants to free your mind...

I decide to do push-ups on the bar that goes across the weight bench. Laurie corrects me on that one too. Later, she wants me to try doing a push-up with one of those human-size rubber bands attached to the pull-up bar and I actually like this method better.

I feel punch-drunk and I'm the last one to finish 18...15...12. I stagger but I manage not to do a push-up on my knees. Now, if I can just remember all that stuff about proper form...

When Not to Rock the Baby

I felt rather saucy yesterday and decided to do the total body circuit on Jackie Warner's Personal Training DVD.

My abs + hamstrings + quads + gluteus maximus, minimus, medius = sore. Unimaginable soreness with every little move.

Oh my God. Yoga was not very restorative. Warrior Two? Rocking the baby? Bending? Climbing stairs? Kneeling? Sitting? Standing? Ill-advised.

I'm not a fan of hot summer baths during stormy weather but it is definitely Epsom Salt time...

Then Soak

Walgreens had Epsom Salt on sale and I went to grab a bag because, like hummus or Steamfresh vegetables, I like to have it at hand. Imagine my delight when I discovered that they were six pound bags; I stocked up. It was such a little thing but it made me happy. Crazy, I know.

When I went climbing, I noticed that my index finger (left hand), pinkie finger (right hand), hip (left side) and ankle (right leg) are all sore. I have no idea how they became sore. I do, however, know why my fingertips are sore -- back-to-back climbing. In addition, there is the on-again off-again shoulder tweak.

I am starting to feel like Allen Iverson.



Okay, I'm not that banged up.

There was a really nice article about Iverson's toughness but I can't find it. I do like how USA Today described him as being generously listed at 6-0, 165 pounds. In addition, Iverson said that his football background prepared him for the contact he got when driving lanes filled with seven footers.

Hmmm, guess what I'm telling myself is to suck it up -- then soak.

The Social Part Of It

Here's what my inbox looked like this week:

Pictures of What Else? Rock Climbing

Climbing, FYI

Climbing 5:30 p.m.

Climbing This Week

Re: Climbing This Week

Re: Climbing, FYI

So, yeah, the dishes aren't washed and I haven't stretched but I got my climb on this week. I did manage to get in an Epsom Salt bath (while eating a paltry sandwich and reading a book) but I won't be able to do that anymore as I've reached the bottom of the salt box...

My "new" boss decided to have an Ice Cream Social for all three of her departments yesterday and, even if we didn't eat ice cream, she wanted us to come for the social part of it. The social was not at the most ideal time but I thought it would be rude not to attend. And guess what? I ended up sitting across from a rock climber. I also got some tips from her about front crawl breathing. I wanted to also get rock climbing tips since she's a lead climber and is able to ascend routes in the 5.11 range but I ran out of time.

I have not been climbing too much out of my comfort zone because my shoulder is still bothering me but here are the results.


Route Tally for Oct. 13th:

Billy Goat Chips, 5.8 (Burly for a 5.8)
Life in the Pack, 5.8
Scott's First, 5.8
Steller's, 5.8
Where The Beer Flows Like Wine, 5.8 (Attempted)

Photosynthesis, 5.9 (climbed 3/4 of the way as I played guinea pig for some one's belay certification)

Photosynthesis, 5.9
Six Week Warrior, 5.9
Slammer, 5.9 (Attempted)

Been to any ice cream socials this week? Stuck on the same exercise note?

The Plan

Patti: What’s the plan for tomorrow?

'Drea: First, LOL, I plan to take an Epsom Salt bath. My calves are so sore that I was walking down the steps sideways. I did a bit of yoga so they are feeling better. You know that I wanna climb though. So, if the Ep doesn't do the trick, I might just gut it out anyway...

Colleague One: What is going on with you?


Mother: Are your legs sore?


Colleague Two: Are you okay?

Colleague Three: What happened?

Me: Too much exercise.

Colleague Three: That has never happened to me.

Me: Maybe it will.

Colleague Three: It hasn't happened yet.

Colleague Four: I should take a picture of you.


Mother: Whatever exercise you did, don't do it anymore.


My sore calves and penguin-like walk are courtesy of Kate's Tuesday night special. About 15 minutes into class Kate asked us, in the middle of jumping jacks, how we were doing but no one answered because, well, we had already exerted a lot of energy. Our inability to respond resulted in more jumping jacks -- not to mention the lunges and planks that followed.

In the end, I should know better than to take a class from someone who wasn't alive in 1980 or 1985 or 1989.

Been to any painful exciting classes lately?

Together With Stretching And Epsom Salt

Rock climbing is a religious experience. Why? The only thing coming out of my mouth post-climbing was an Oh My God chant.

There was some weird intensity going through my arms. Even though I know that I need to keep straight arms while climbing, it's a whole different affair when I hit the wall.

Without delay, I popped in a DVD and selected the stretch portion of 10 Minute Solution: Tone Trouble Zones! After tearing myself down, I like to put myself back together with stretching and Epsom Salt.

While I was climbing, there was this Korean woman who looked like she was an AP photographer or something. She was documenting the experience for her sons. As I untied from a rope, she patted me on the back and told me nice hobby. Cute gesture. I told her that she had a nice hobby too since she had a serious telephoto lens on her camera. Korean mama had such a friendly face underneath some rather tall hair that reminded me of The Supremes.

I struggled, inexplicably, with the easier routes. Patti pulled the psychological card. My struggle with the 5.6's was probably part mental and part stair/hill workout yesterday.

Today's tally:

Truxton or Bust, 5.6
Bright Idea, 5.8
Sol, 5.7
Gymnopaeda, 5.7
Face Plant, 5.8
Unidentified, 5.7 (near Sol)
Unidentified, 5.7 (near Gym...)
Rainbow Bright, 5.8
Unidentified, 5.6 (warm-down; down climbed as well)

Note to self: Straight arms, girl. Straight arms.

Playbook: Rock Climbing 101 | Movies & TV | SPIKE.com

Eyes On The Thighs

I was heading out to lunch to have my usual turkey sandwich, hummus, Wasa crackers and baked chips when one of my colleagues pulled out of the alley. I've worked with her for over five years but she said, at that moment, she almost didn't recognize me, wanted to know how much weight I had lost and couldn't believe that I wanted to lose more weight (a recurring theme lately).

Sometimes I forget how much weight I've lost but, yes, I have lost a significant amount of weight but being up close and personal with the mirror yesterday was also a reality check. My BMI is still in the obese range and I still have some heft to contend with but contend with I will.

I took it to the StairMaster today -- sore behind and all. I climbed for 45 minutes, came home and stretched for ten then soaked with some Epsom Salt in the mix.

Speaking of contenders, I love this Dayquil commercial featuring Apolo Ohno. I also have a thing for super heroes. Possibly my need to believe that good conquers all...



I love the thighs on the speed skaters and I love to watch them do that side exercise they do, with and without the special belt that is used. And here's a video that showcases what it takes to be an Olympic speed skater which, in the end, just makes me want to push myself harder.



If the video doesn't work, here's the link .

Just Bicycles And Planks

I hauled it across town to get to Cardio and Muscle.

I went a long way and I've come a long way. I wanted to make it on time and participate in that class with every fiber of my being.

I changed into my workout clothes the way Clark Kent changed in a telephone booth. I walked into class just as they began to march.

Be careful of what you ask for. As the saying goes, you just might get it.

Swing, swing, swing, Kate called out as we swung our imaginary jump ropes.

Up, up, up. I think Kate got stuck on a note because she was calling for up even while we were doing fast feet.

Kate came and did fast feet by me at one point and, of course, I had to rise to the challenge. My feet have never been faster. ;)

We did some kickboxing moves. We lifted our knee as if we were aiming at an attacker. Then we squatted it out followed by jacking it out.

We also worked with a resistance band and regular weights and did the obligatory ab work.

We went hard and hard again for our last eight minute cardio stint.

Don't quit. Go all out.

It was only fitting that Rhianna's SOS was playing around this time but there was no rescue -- just bicycles and planks.

Post-Script:

Epsom Salt Directions (For External Use)

As a bathing solution: 2 cups added to the bath water for a refreshing bath after strenuous exertion.

TopCare didn't lie; it was a refreshing bath.

Cheese or Milk?

Over the years, people have suggested soaking in warm water and Epsom salt to ease muscle soreness. I never questioned the method but didn't really know why Epsom salt was a balm until I was reading the September Shape.

Your skin absorbs the magnesium in the salts, which reduces muscle swelling.

Of course, I have no need for Epsom salt with this being my tenth consecutive day of exercise. I didn't even know if I would have anything in the tank today but I hit the StairMaster for 40 minutes then I got on the treadmill for 25 minutes with four minutes of jogging.

Another item of interest that I saw in Shape was a got milk? ad featuring Dara Torres. I've seen the ad several times and the cheesy vibe that I get won't go away. I dig Dara Torres. I like her comeback story and love that she was out there doing her thing with people half her age but when I look at other got milk? ads, I wonder what the photographer had in mind. It's something about the way Torres is positioned that doesn't make for an authentic or captivating pose. Yeah, her taut stomach and subtle six pack is awesome but...







P.S. Massage can also offer relief according to Fast Relief For Post-Workout Aches in the Shape Ask Our Trainer column. I'm definitely going to take that suggestion to heart.