Yoga Tantrum

So, yeah, I'm heading home after yoga and I'm about one block away from home when I see an unmarked car suddenly all lit up.

The cop skid across the street and arrived at the bumper of this car. Another driver put his car in reverse and was so close that I could see the smirk on his face. My instinct was to try to get out of the way but I stayed put. As I turned away from the smirk, I saw that the officer had pulled out a firearm.

I went around the scene and, in retrospect, I should have gone in the other direction. Just because the officer had his weapon drawn didn't mean that the area was secure. Le sigh...I was a bit dazed by my post-yoga high.

Fast forward to this morning. Nothing feels abnormal. I head to Gloria's class and walk in with Tammy and Mike who normally go to the 11 o'clock class. Juliano and Alison are already there. When I realize that Mike, Tammy, Alison, Juliano and I are all in the same row, it feels a bit cliquish.

Maybe I need to practice yoga at home for a while. Maybe I need to go back to my old spot in the back of the room.

At some point, I pose a bitchy question to Alison and have no idea where it came from or how it formed in my mind.

I hear the always late Linda come in quietly but I can still hear the velcro as she unrolls her mat...

I go through the motions: high lunge, downward facing dog, chair...Think that maybe I'm doing too much yoga -- as if less yoga will help.

I stand in tadasana when Gloria calls for eagle* pose because I know that I will come completely undone if any eagle arms are legs are attempted.

After class, Juliano asks me how I'm doing and a tear rolls down my left eye as he's giving me a hug because It looks like I need one. I also get a hug from Sherry and, by the time Alison gets to me, the tears are really rolling.

During my Saturday class, I looked at my collection of scars. As I looked at them, thought about Lolo Jones and how she once said that the thing that she likes most about her body is the scars (from jumping over hurdles).

Thinking of Lolo Jones appeased me at the time but, later on, I read an article about fat-shaming in yoga but I also remember a post by Lisa over at Just here. Just now. and she talks about visiting a Bikram studio out of town and how her friend's teacher said that the mirrors are there for alignment not judgment. Lisa goes on to make her own revelation:

...it's not just alignment of your hips, it's about alignment with the truth. Alignment with the moment...Alignment with what is possible, and not possible, that day.  

As I walked yesterday, I listened to Krista Tippett on The Moth. Tippet's grandfather believed that his religion was the only true one. At some point, Tippet visits "psychic" Mary Madison who tells Tippet that her grandfather realizes that he was too strict with himself. Totally related. Also related when Tippet says: I'm not sure what happened in Mary Madison's house that day...It's in that realm of mystery that I honor.


*According to Yoga Journal, one of the benefits of eagle pose is that it improves sense of balance. 

Dismiss Your Body...

Rolled out and met Gloria for breakfast. Had the herbivore omelet with broccoli, onions, peppers and mushrooms with a side of sweet potato hash. Yummy. There was a caveman omelet which didn't even tempt me.

After breakfast, Gloria and I went on a tour of KDHX's new digs. The radio station is run by volunteers and their new space is very nice.

Cool Ass Retro TV at KDHX

One of the Views from Radio Station

When I was at work on Friday, someone asked me had I heard about what happened to The 'Fugee....? -- not a question that you really want to hear.

The 'Fugee, wearing seldom worn shoes, tumbled down about 15 steps and her fallen was broken by a window pane. Ouch, ouch and more ouch.

As I went about my day, I thought about The 'Fugee -- replaying the tumble in my head even though I hadn't witnessed it.

The 'Fugee has several lacerations, bruises, black eyes and fractures including a calcaneal fracture which I did not know is also known as lover's fracture. According to Wikipedia:

The name lover's fracture is derived from the fact that a lover may jump from great heights while trying to escape from the lover's spouse.

Hazira's nephew-in-law joked that it was a good thing that she hit the glass because a wall is less forgiving. Of course, the glass has its own danger; one of my childhood friends lost her brother that way.

Hazira's nephew joked that her arms will be more toned from walking around with crutches and whatnot but, all joking aside, we are grateful that The 'Fugee is okay...

Where The 'Fugee's Fall Was Broken

Went to yoga and, at one point, wondered why I had even bothered to show up. We did eagle pose in the middle of class and, because I loathe eagle, just hearing the name of the pose almost drove me over the edge. I know, I know; it's not about the pose. I'm feeling tired and like I can't catch up with tasks etc.

During savasana, Alison said Dismiss your body from any responsibilities. Dismiss your mind from worry. Relax...And, as she talked, her feet made the most rhythmic sound on the environmentally-friendly floor. I almost started bawling.

...Genuinely Nice

Asmira's sugar-free, fat-free masterpiece.

I am not a party person so when my aunt asked about my yoga party, I quickly called it by another name --- a birthday yoga class.

Wanted to have a yoga class for the b-day last year but sat on the fence too long. I still had the urge so I thought about where I could have it and who would guide.

I asked Gloria and her answer was a supersized yes and I still have not found the appropriate words to convey how thankful I am.

I sent out invitations and asked people not to bring gifts. Why did you tell people not to bring anything? one of my friends asked. It feels good to be able to sing those Tuck and Patti lyrics: I have just about everything I need. Although, I will admit that I cannot resist the lure of workout clothes and I'm often tempted to buy more workout equipment.

The Gifts That I Was Not Supposed To Get

Today didn't go as I planned but it was a wonderful opportunity to practice yoga principles and to witness how magnanimous people can be. Even though it didn't go exactly as planned, it turned out beautifully. The energy was really good and I think that everyone enjoyed themselves.

Even Borat said: It (the birthday yoga class) was genuinely nice.

Thanks so much to everyone for making it such a lovely day.

Lori Revisiting Plank. Borat and I Content With Sukhasana (Easy Pose)

A Deeper Look Inside of Asmira's Confection

A Closer Look at the Calla Lilies

Favorite Gloria-ism of the day: Every time (birthday) you step on your yoga mat, it's an opportunity to have a clean slate. Gloria said it much nicer but you get the picture.

Gloria also threw in eagle pose which tends to make me cringe. I totally saw my "office wife" nod in the affirmative when Gloria said that sometimes the poses that we like the least are the ones that we need to do the most.

Melinda would totally agree with this quote by Paris Hilton that Gloria read at the beginning of class:

The way I see it, you should live every day like it's your birthday.

One of the most memorably moments from the class, besides grunting from the newbies, was a post-savasana Gloria saying: Make a beautiful spine and the sun from the sky light falling across her face.

Can Feel The Warmth of The Coffee Cup That I Will Have In My Hands...

Standing the Heat or Month-End Review, October

Wanted to commemorate Cindy’s last day teaching hot yoga by attending her class. I haven’t practiced hot yoga in almost five months and, boy, did my mind start talking to me. Would I be able to withstand the heat? Would I be able to stay in the room for 90 minutes?

I also thought about all of the poses that I’d rather not do.


My mind was still noisy when I saw Cindy mention an article, Top Five Yoga Pet Peeves, on Twitter. The article spoke to me, made me laugh and relax and I decided to relax into my practice by trying eagle pose which I’ve never done before in hot yoga.

While we did our final major pose, seated forward bend, Cindy told us that it was a symbolic ending pose to kind of close up after doing so many opening poses. Kind of like a hibiscus, I guess, that opens up then closes then opens up again…

Afterwards, Cindy and I talked about eagle pose and I told her that my body just didn’t wrap like that to which she said I’m sure that it wraps in other wonderful ways…Namaste...

October totals:

10 Minute Solution: Tone Trouble Zones!

10 Minute Stretch, 2 x's

Bicycling, 2 x's

Climbing, 4 x's

Kettlebell, 4 x's

Swimming, 7 x's

Treadmill, 1 x

Walking, 12 x's

Yoga, 13 x's

Garudasana Standstill

It usually makes me feel better to acknowledge something that is bothering me so I'm just going to go ahead and put it out there: I hate eagle pose and I feel like my body wasn't made to intertwine like that.

When I saw these "cookies" over at Yoga Spy's blog, it made me smile; now, that's what you call having a playful attitude towards a pose but, if you notice, none of the cookies are doing eagle. Of course, I see the contradiction but I'm making up my own rule: have a playful attitude when approaching poses except for when it comes to eagle. I can make up my own rules, right?



Yesterday, the humidity was high as all get out in Hot Yoga. At one point, the teacher, Val, walked by me and I felt a breeze. I kept hoping that she would walk by again and again.


If it helps, imagine air circulating in your lower back. Val said that after bow pose as we were supposed to breathe into our lower backs but let me tell you, Val, imagination does not help after bow...


Speaking of saying things, I'm almost reluctant to mention this because I don't want to jinx it but since I've been going to Hot Yoga on a regular basis, my contact dermatitis has been dormant. Coinkydink???

That's Why They Call It A Practice

Not sure if someone fell asleep while standing up but Jeremy made a point of telling us to keep our eyes open even if we were in the upright position -- That way, I know that you're still alive.

He also wanted us to keep poses alive by remembering to breathe.

I got straight up called out during eagle pose. I usually take a break during this pose and that's when I heard:

Jeremy: Can you do the crossing part?

Me: My shoulders are tight.

Jeremy: And that's why...

Several of us laughed and I definitely felt busted. How did he know that I wasn't "resting resting" in mountain to pace myself?...

Jeremy gave some good demonstrations. Before standing bow, he pointed out how your shoulder should be behind your head and then posed textbook-style.

During downward facing dog, he said to make sure that your biceps are by your ears, a really helpful pointer for me.

And at some point, he reminded us that falling out of poses etc. is why it's called a yoga practice, a nice reminder to hear since it makes me more willing to try poses that I feel are beyond me and, really, there are many poses that I subconsciously forget about until we get to them and then I groan but I try (most of) them anyway...

Bow

Camel

Half Tortoise

Standing Head to Knee

Camel, in particular, bothers me when I'm trying to do it AND when other people do it but, hopefully, I'll make peace with the pose eventually.

We lost one today (heat-induced migraine?) and then Jeremy took it out on the rest of us since he doesn't like it when someone has to leave the room. No knees on the floor during plank and we held the various positions on at least one yogi sit-up for a double count. Ouch.

Beginning Position for Half Tortoise...Forehead Should Get to Mat First and Hips On the Heels but That Hasn't Happened for Me Yet...

Also, pretty much at a stalemate with the losing weight thing but I like, for the most part, how my body is looking right now.

Rendezvoused

Eight of us rendezvoused for rock climbing and it was fun playing musical climbing partners. When Jessica and I climbed together, I asked her if she knew how to do Eagle Pose and she quickly put her arms and legs together. As I tried it, I made a comment about my shoulders and Jessica added, and I'm paraphrasing, that I had something else sticking out that prevented me from doing Eagle. I laughed because I hadn't thought of that.

I also asked Jessica about flip turns because I think it's about time. She suggested that I practice somersaults on land and that I remember to breathe once I actually start practicing in water.

After we've climbed for a while, we usually ask one another how many routes we have left in us.

Me: I'm done.

Patti: I don't see your fork.

Me: It's in my forkarm.

When I repeated this joke to Leah and Mike, it was like someone hit the instant replay button. Their faces slowly crumpled upon hearing the punchline. Patti got in on the joking too.

Jessica: I'm going to change.

Patti (while slipping her arm around Jessica): Don't change. You're lovely the way you are.

Me: Don't go changing...to try to please me...

As we were leaving, we exchanged holiday greetings. Leah was trying to spare me a sweaty shirt when I pulled her in and said Have yourself a sweaty little Christmas.

And, now, I can't get this song out of my head...

Hot Yoga Eve

Well, actually, it's not the eve of hot yoga since I went today but that's what Patti called it as we reached the end of our countdown.

I'm not quite sure when I agreed to try hot yoga because I don't really like a lot of heat but figured that I could survive a hot yoga class if I was able to survive Las Vegas in July.

The Yoga Nazi teacher introduced himself then handed down the rules and the one that sticks out the most is that once class started, you were not allowed to alter the aura by leaving the room.

I seldom take a shine to anything of a mandatory nature so I just filed that away. Other rules included:

No talking in class

No cell phones (applause) etc. etc.

No intake of water in the middle of a pose

If you get tired, assume the position on your knees and gaze...

Eyes open (with exception of Savasana) at all times

I decided to wear my green t-shirt made out of bamboo and my sole pair of official yoga pants and they worked beautifully.

I managed to find myself at the front of the room and I survived that too.

Even in regular yoga class, I can't manage Eagle and it was definitely unmanageable since I was completely slick with sweat. In the end, my shoulders are way too tight for this move. And Standing Head to Knee pose? Yeah, that didn't work for me either.

As we did yogic sit-ups and planks, I tried to gauge what time it was and was so relieved when the 1.5 hours was up.

We went into Savasana and the teacher said that we should hold the pose for three to five minutes. I've never had a yoga teacher walk out during Savasana but today was the day. What happened to holding the space? That's something that Madonna did beautifully in Candlelight Restorative Yoga. Or, since Hot Yoga is kind of hardcore, should I not expect the teacher to hold the space?