Monday, January 25, 2010

The Imposter Rut

Diane, over at Fit to the Finish, had a recent post called My Lame Excuse List and posed the question What’s been your favorite “I can’t get started” excuse?

My response? I never made excuses because I thought I was sexy as all get out. In fact, in high school, my nickname was Sexy Wren. Don’t ask what high school I went to…

Recently, I have been feeling unsexy. How weird is that? I lose 60 pounds and my body image takes a dive. I won’t even delve into the psychological ramifications of this inversion. Denial? Coping? Who knows?

My scale has not moved since early November 2009 and being in a two month rut makes the imagination run wild. You start to wonder what you are doing wrong, if you’re eating enough or too much. Maybe you’re eating too many fat calories or not the right combination of carbs, proteins and fats.

Lately, though, I’ve been seeing quite a few posts about non scale victories and I was really moved by this post at *Bitch Cakes* who talks about reframing and focusing on what you’re doing right.

Also, Mish’s collective post, Getting Fit, Not Thin, stuck with me.

*Bitch Cakes* brought it home in another post in which she said that this fitness journey is not a race .

Likewise, it was helpful to be reminded on MizFit that the calorie is king.

Even though the scale hasn’t moved, I do have more room in my clothes. My rings no longer fit on my ring finger. I wear an L in most clothes instead of clothes with tags that look like a Super Bowl championship number.

My once snug glasses are loose.

I'm also having to adjust my climbing harness more than I did before.

And the biggest bonus? I am fit. Very. I hit the gym six days out of seven.

I eat up – trading white rice for brown.

I no longer drink soda.

I don’t eat food with high fructose corn syrup.

While I can and should eat better, I’m still doing a lot of things right.

I’ve shrunk out of five swimming suits…

Speaking of swimming, I went tonight after a three week hiatus because of a cold and the cold.

After swimming 18 laps, I got in the hot tub. I know why the lifeguards walk around the edge of it; I’m sure someone has fallen asleep and almost drowned.


  1. You are good! You are great! Those NSV's are really precious to think about and those you listed are some of my best memories about losing weight. They really helped me when the scale stalled for a while.

    I love that you shrank out of 5 sizes of bathing suits. That is amazing!

  2. Diane,

    Yes, I really need to keep the NSV's in mind. I think they are going to keep me sane ;) -- especially as I try to get closer to my *main* weight loss goal.

    Thanks for the input.

  3. Love your non-scale victory list...Sometimes, we need to be reminded just how far we've come. Just yesterday I zipped up a pair of boots I couldn't have zipped up all the way a year ago...and it made me smile.

  4. Ms. Bad Mama Jama,

    Sometimes I need frequent reminders. ;)

    It is pretty nice when you've had something sitting on the sideline and you can get into it again.

    I've had several tops that were too tight that I can now comfortably wear. How sweet it is...