Rolling Out

Alison usually goes with me to Art in Bloom but she was camping. I had also invited an aunt and her friend. The friend couldn't go and my aunt called to say that she had had a doozy of a week and didn't want to go. I invited one more person and when that didn't pan out, decided to go by myself.

Surprisingly, I left the house at 11:00 a.m. and it turned out to be a good time as I was able to park relatively close. Plus, the museum wasn't packed. I got a  map and slowly worked my way through the museum.

People were in a good mood the way they are when on vacation. Ran into a few people that I know and think that I saw just about every floral arrangement. Art in Bloom turned out to be a good way to decompress.

Afterward... did yard work, picked up my bike, went to the grocery store, cleaned the fish tank, washed and braided my hair. It was a full Saturday...

Rolled out today and went to one of the fancier locations of my climbing gym because they had $5 dollar passes for women in honor of International Women's Day.  It was so nice to have a wider variety of routes and to be in a more spacious gym...

A few of my faves from Art in Bloom.

Accidental hue as my camera's got shifted as I juggled belongings.

The Chorus

Trying not to join the chorus of people who are saying "I'm tired of winter" because it is, after all, still winter.

My backup camera days ago...

It's the six month of being super understaffed at work and people send me emails like "Circling back to the email that I sent you..." because I can't keep up. As John Lewis said, upon finding out information about his ancestors in Finding Your Roots, It's too much... It's to the point that if someone doesn't get back to me, I don't get upset; I sympathize and think that they are possibly understaffed.

The 'fugee suggested that I continue to concentrate on increasing the quality of my life in other areas, and that's what I try to do.

Went to the mall on Saturday for bath bombs and thought about going to look for sweat pants which I've suddenly become obsessed with and as I looked at Macy's, remembered that I'd bought a blue pair of sweat pants that I was very happy with. The sweat pants were in the basement sitting on top of a the laundry basket -- in plain sight...

Taught my fourth Seva class and it felt like the worst one. Forgot this one sequence within the sequence. Felt out of sync etc. but people were kind and stopped to thank me before they left.

I shouldn't be surprised about my "off day" as work was rough. At some point, realized that I was going to have to tap into my well of resources and try to find some semblance of balance before teaching yoga.

Went climbing tonight but wasn't looking forward to it after the outing that I had last time. On my last route during that outing my patella felt like it took a tiny elevator. My knee cooperated tonight and, in general, feels better.

When Patti messaged me about climbing, said that I was coming but didn't know if I had what it took to climb and she messaged me back Hahahahah...of course you have what it takes. Don't be silly.

What do they say on social media? #ImNotCryingYoureCrying

Feelings

Went climbing tonight.

I'm feeling confident on the wall again. 

In general, I feel like I'm shedding the heaviness of winter and making better decisions about eating. While it wasn't rock bottom, I was certainly indulging in foods that I should have left alone. 

In many ways, I feel like I'm struggling with stuff like getting myself ready for work, household chores etc. 

I also don't feel like I'm in the zone of contentment like I was for a long time. I'm short-tempered and I feel my reactions to certain people are juvenile and that's not where I want to be. 

The Third One

In recent dreams, I hear loud noises -- possibly gunshots and just maybe I'm not dreaming but I've also heard loud collisions in my dreams. According to Google, there's something called Exploding Head Syndrome. Okay...

Went climbing tonight and felt good about my outing and felt good about the last one. I've been mentally preparing myself for climbing and it has made a difference.

Took a salt bath and read more of Don't Let's Go to the Dogs Tonight...

Earlier in the week, signed up for an event/conversation between Sharon Salzberg and George Mumford. At the time of the webinar, realized that I had to download an app so I aborted the mission but later on I got an email saying that the conversation would be available for viewing (today only) so I listened to it. Three things that stuck with me:

1). Nothing in life is a straight shot. Sharon Salzberg

2), A mistake is an event -- something that we can learn from; it's not an identification or badge. George Mumford

3). Everybody's life is so changeable. Sharon S.

The third one really sticks with me.

Okay

Dragged myself out of bed at 10:00 a.m. on Sunday. Also cannot manage to make it to work at the time that I usually do. I need a handler...

Had a really good yoga class on Monday night and, afterward, Joy handed me a calendar filled with pictures of our Jamaican retreat. Nice surprise...

April 

Before swimming yesterday, I imagined asking the minister who also swims what does he say to despairing church members but then I also imagined that swimming is his form of meditation and time away from despairing people. The minister wasn't at the pool  but the man who is one of the youth coaches and who recently had surgery and whose wife said he shouldn't be alive was there after a long hiatus.

I took my foggy glasses off and it wasn't long before they hit the floor. One of the teenage lifeguards picked it up and I was touched by that simple act of kindness. I asked her how she was doing and she said tired because of a swim meet and her home was no respite because her brothers are always on PlayStation and screaming like banshees...

Went climbing with Mike and Patti; we all had good climbing nights...

Some asshole hit my car while it was parked even though I've gone out of my way to park at the back of parking lots and away from people who can't park straight and, of course, they didn't bother to stick around. Not an earth-shattering amount of damage but it still sucks.

One of dramatic coworkers likes to ask Is everything under control? Today he said something about wanting to be a worry-free dolphin and also taking his wisdom from the trees who don't worry about bills and housing. Mmmm, okay.

Decent

Went climbing last night and actually had a decent outing. At some point, Patti started talking about Star Wars Day. Let's just say that I once made the faux pas of talking about Star Trek while the topic was about the other Star...

Talking about Star Wars took me back to Jason Schmidt's memoir, "A List of Things...," when he verbally explodes on classmates plus a teacher and he has to go to mandated counseling. During the course of the first session, the counselor questions why Jason wants to be Han Solo instead of Luke Skywalker and Jason responds:

"...Luke wants to be a hero because he's got some stupid idea about being the good guy just to be the good guy. Han and Leia do it because they know why it's important. They understand what's at stake. Luke never even seems to think about that part of it...He just wants to be the guy with the blaster who everyone says 'thank you' to..."

"Luke doesn't want to be good. He wants everyone else to think he's good. It's different. That's why he's vulnerable to the dark side. He's full of pride..." (133-134)

On a completely different note, a new coworker is fascinated by all things Japanese which made me think of Ashima Shiraishi, a young Japanese climber. I read another article about Shiraishi and I like how her father told her to focus on her "small universe" a.k.a. her core.

Back to my new coworker... I love it that she has a tattoo of a Moomin. Too funny...

Not funny? There's no kombucha in this house.

Until I Get My Groove Back

Youth Team's Gear

Went swimming last night and the youth organization was running behind schedule so I paid the admission fee then walked over to speak with the wife/husband team in charge of the youth group whilst the youngsters finished.

The wife told me that their son, who looks like he's in his early 20's, had a heart attack. That whole scenario sounded implausible. Yes, yes, I'm the queen of denial.

The son in question swam last night and the husband told me what is heart rate was at the time practice started and he would later tell me that his son had been, pretty much, dead and he'd told his son the equivalent of God has something greater in store for you... Apparently, there'd been some tension between the parents and son but, hopefully, the medical emergency will heal some wounds...

Budgeted time for six minutes of yoga in bed this a.m. and I liked the sequence. Although I was totally digging the in bed part and was slightly disappointed when Tara Stiles called for standing up, it made perfect sense in that I was going to have to eventually stand up to greet the day and I might as well stand strong in tree pose beforehand.

Went climbing this p.m. and I'm not very good at climbing right now but no one is grading me so I'll keep plugging away at it until I get my groove back...

The intern in my office mentioned that she couldn't sleep last night so she and her roommate ordered Insomnia Cookies but the whole point of her store was that her roommate had only ordered milk and they had to wait even longer to get the cookies. The intern was surprised that we hadn't heard of the cookie company. Seriously, what will people come up with next?

Different Day

Climbing left a lot to be desired last night. In fact, it was downright frustrating but I guess I'll just say that I practiced climbing. If one can practice yoga then one can certainly practice climbing.

During the course of a convo with Patti about a tempting birthday lunch that she'd gone to, I was surprised to find out that she does not eat sprouted bread -- didn't know that was not allowed with Paleo...

One person at work has lost over 30 pounds and two people have lost over 20. My immediate coworker is not eating carbs and fruits right now and neither is the 'Fugee. It's a different March Madness, I guess.

After Zumba tonight asked the teacher how her corned-beef pizza turned out and she told me that it was very tasty. Her husband added hash browns this time. Tonight is also pizza night for her but this time it's Diablo pizza.

Before I left work, placed an order at Lona's because I was too tired and crabby to be in the kitchen. Even bird chirping got on my nerves today but I will say that when I split my burrito in half, Prince's U Got The Look popped into my head so I guess I chirped in my own way.

Big Thai Chicken Wrap with Rice Paper

Like Slackers

I was admiring the flowers and thinking how they seemed to have appeared out of nowhere and, of course, that's not true. The seeds were planted or scattered. Seeing the colorfulness made me reflect on Joy's Imbolc talk.

Went climbing this evening and I'm able to climb better each time that I go. I returned Patti's Fitbit. When I misplaced my Garmin tracker, Patti told me that she would give me her Fitbit that was being replaced because of inaccuracy but then she gave me the wrong Fitbit. She strapped both of them on her dominant hand and starting climbing stairs in between climbing routes to test them out. Patti's husband and I concluded that she was just trying to make us feel like slackers. At any rate, I think that Patti the right Fitbit now.

On the way home, I was treated to a beautiful evening sky. Kept stopping to take pictures and finally got one that accurately reflected the color.

Really enjoyed this Instagram that was posted today...

Extra Cheese

Went climbing last night and I've progressed a tiny bit. As I got ready to belay, asked a fellow climber, Mike, how he was doing. He told me that he was tired and that his allergies were getting the best of him and if it wasn't for medicine, he probably would have sneezed his head off. In addition, he'd had a rough day at work.

Mike works at a Google-like company and, for some reason, I thought my not working at a Google-like company was a contributing factor to many things but, alas, I see that working at Google-like company ain't no crystal stair either.

At some point during the climbing session, realized that I didn't have my fitness tracker around my wrist. Goodbye $99 dollars. Called the gym this morning and someone had turned it in. Thank you...

After picking up my tracker, went to Soulard to get pizza. It was my first time visiting the pizza joint and I was surprised to see statues of Buddha and Ganesha. No, I don't mind looking at the remover of obstacles while I wait for a vegan pepperoni pizza which was nice and spicy. I'd never had vegan pepperoni before. Thumbs up.

Ganesha at the Pizza Shop

As I waited for the pizza, someone called in an order and the owner said I know who that is -- she always asks for extra cheese. Kind of funny.

Went to Zumba tonight even though my knee hasn't been cooperative. Instantly thought about Gingerzingi's husband and his knee issue. It's so nice when the body is not cranky. Not sure why my knee is tweaked but I did dance away some of the constriction.

Wish

Had buyer's remorse last night. Went climbing and it was not a productive outing. Between being out of shape and being overly cautious about my ankle, I wondered about the wisdom of renewing my membership at the climbing gym but this too shall pass.

Went to yoga after work and cannot believe that January  and free yoga at our friendly neighborhood studio is coming to an end. The woman who practiced next to me will have, by Sunday, 30 classes under her belt  on her mat which makes her eligible for the free year of yoga drawing and she's not the only one. I think Joy said there were over 30 people on track.

Wish that I could have gone to 30 classes but it would have made me nutty trying to, say, hit yoga after work then go swimming. In the end, I don't think it would have been a peaceful experience for me running from one place to the other...

As Shonda Rhimes says, TGIT.

No Pressure

Rope Wreath

As Patti and I walked into the climbing gym last night, she said I forgot to take my ibuprofen...

Patti is so good at climbing and, in general, not a complainer so I sometimes forget that she has arthritis.

Of all the activities that I've been easing back into, I had the most apprehension about climbing. In fact, just call me the world's most careful climber. Thought I would be able to wear my foot brace but there's not much room in climbing shoes for anything other than feet so I cautiously made my way up four routes.

Ankle is a little throbby today but that might be the new normal for a while.

In some respects, it has been nice to have a break and go slow. I'm been exercising almost non-stop for eight years  and approaching activities in an easy manner ups the level of efficiency and makes me concentrate more on form.

I've been in a no pressure state of mind.

Went to a Yoga Buzz play date at Title Boxing tonight and knew that I would be in for a rabid cardio kind of class mixed with boxing. I remained still during moves that I thought would compromise my ankle but I had fun punching. My upper body was all bunched up when I finished but I was reminded of how good of a workout boxing can be. I was also reminded that you must have your own gloves if you're serious about boxing. Gym gloves are disgusting...

Careful

Be careful what you asked for...

Might have lost my photos to a restore but Patti took some as well and, so, there was photographic proof of just how much I've chunked up.

I just make myself work harder now. No one wonder I had tender biceps from trying to haul myself upwards. At any rate, I still appreciate all the things that my body can do.

Patti Dangling Above Me

Even The Big Kids Got One

Walked to work this morning and thought I'd try a new podcast but switched gears about six minutes into Not Too Deep with Grace Helbig. I'll give it a try later on down the line. Instead, I listened to How Does a Mediator Work?, from Slate's Working lineup. A giant thumbs up from me. I enjoyed listening to the mediator/shamanic healer. Energy work fascinates me.

Liked what Clemants had to say about people with heavy energy -- how they walk into a room and make you want to move away. Clemants said they haven't done the work to get rid of that heavy energy...

On another note, one of my coworkers said that she had a very realistic dream about me. I was upset about work apparently.

About Leaving The Forest Floor

No Saturday bicycling as partners in crime had restrictions on their time. Plus, it was a little chilly and windy for riverfront cycling.

Alison and I went to Zumba instead. There were a bunch of newbies who looked like they belonged to the same family. As the first member left early, I encouraged her stay but she said I'm headed back to the treadmill. It's too much jiggling for me. Hilarious!

Thought I had all the time in the world but barely had enough time to grab lunch before I headed out to the Shaw Nature Reserve for a canopy climbing workshop.

The trees are spectacular right now so the drive was amazing.

As I hauled myself upwards, didn't feel an ounce of trepidation about leaving the forest floor. I guess that's one of rock climbing's gifts to me.

Canopy climbing requires a lot of coordination and I had a hard time pushing one rope up and then pushing my foot strap up etc. I never got the right balance and, as a result, I was almost in a reclining position on the way up which made my body very tense. But Patti? That woman's a natural at climbing and she had ascended two trees, almost, before I got one in.

There was a young lady who was also a natural...

Patti In Her Element

\Drove home and made another pit stop before my trip to the Apple store. My iPod, even with a restore, has still been glitchy and I couldn't back it up. With an appointment, I still had to wait 30 minutes in the super crowded store. As my Aunt Al says about Walmart, you would think Apple is giving stuff away.

As I sat there and waited, I was on the verge of tears. Tiredness was getting the best of me but I do have to say that Apple employees have very good customer service skills. Never saw the technician as the guy who did my intake ran a diagnostic and there were still several issues so he gave me a new iPod.

When I saw that my Ipod couldn't be backed up, did an update on Google Photos to preserve the rest of my pictures from canopy climb but looks like they were lost. F@!$

No Balance

News from 2009

Cindy and Tim were in town so I had a climbing date with them on Sunday at a branch of my gym. Between the "accessible" area being roped off for a class and the high volume of 5.10s, I could barely find anything to climb. So disappointing. I've always liked the new gym for how it's organized (bouldering area, lead climbing area) and for the variety of routes but the latter has changed. Can't say that I'm thrilled about the route selections at my regular gym either.

Not everyone is a highly skilled climber and I just see no balance with the kind of routes being offered. Ugh...

We had a little surprise gathering for my uncle's birthday today. There was an overflow room which held about five people and my uncle ate in there even though we tried to encourage him to go and eat with his birthday well-wishers.

It was really funny when my aunt Debbie and I walked in and found the birthday boy in the overflow room reading a newspaper and it was even funnier when I realized that the paper was really old.

And I laughed because reading in the midst of a party is something that I would totally want to do.

Clean Again

Patti emailed me toward the end of the work day to say that she wasn't feeling very energetic and I told her that once she started climbing the walls, her chi would start flowing again. I was right.

Patti had been upset about something and took her anger out on the wall.

I could see Will's mind in the future as he talked about what he needed to get done: laundry and cooking. He did not appreciate my old joke about laundry in the hamper:

Clothes stored in the hamper long enough, become clean again.

This guy, Chris, showed Will how to climb this one 5.10b route. Chris talked about the difference between trad and sport climbing then told Will about his technique -- I'm moving slow like I'm literally about to step on a mouse trap...

Will told me that he's on his seventh iPod Nano and now gets an extended warranty.

I've done research and there's one company that supposedly replaces iPod Touch screens for $50 and can do it in an hour. Not sure if I should just put that money into a new one or not.

The Hard Part

Favorited a tweet about fitter feet because I'm experiencing on and off tenderness smack dab in the middle of my left foot.

Our feet are always smashed and compressed inside our shoes often too narrow for the toes to move...

I laughed about the whole smashed thing since tonight was climbing night. Rock climbing shoes are big time compressors...

Started up this one route and couldn't hoist myself over the arête. Came down and gave it another try. Got over the arête but felt like I couldn't go any further. I told Patti to let me down and she said  You've already gotten over the hard part.

I gathered myself and continued with my ascent.

It's such a sweet feeling when you do something that you thought you couldn't do. It's been a long time since I've attempted to climb a route with an arête in the mix and I'm grateful to Patti for not letting me quit on that route.

Faux Crux

Got home, took off my jewelry (earrings and necklace with the yoga pendant), took off my clothes, crawled under the covers and touched Sound of Invisible Water which is in my Relaxation, Deuter (Mostly) playlist.

Woke up at 5:21 p.m. and asked myself who had initiated the impending climbing session. Rolled out of bed, looked for my glasses then ate an almond butter and preserves sandwich then headed out.

I am hoarse and feeling foggy-headed. Thought the hoarseness might be a result of the bike ride through the floating white stuff. I don't have a full-blown cold but...

I managed to work my way up routes but not sure how.

As Patti tied in and I secured my Air Traffic Control device, we heard Frank tell James That's not the hard part; the next part is the hard part. Belayers say the darnedest things.

Came home and drew a bath because I thought salt water would make me feel better. I was surprised to see that Dr. Teal's Epsom salt now has a velcro seal. It's the kind of thing that makes me think only in America... It does seal the heck out of the bag though...

Been thinking about Maya Angelou. I often quote Angelou's When you know better, you do better to the 'Fugee.

That particular quote makes me have more compassion for myself. It's also a challenge to do better by others.

I've always remembered a line from Angelou's poem No Loser, No Weeper. She talks about losing things -- a dime or a doll.

"Now if I felt that way bout a watch and a toy,
What you think I feel about my lover-boy?..."

Dose of Climbing, Tony and Gloria

Shake out your arms and figure out where you're going -- a belayer to his climber.

Hadn't been climbing in a month. Can you say struggle? There was an arete route in my grade range. Never did get over the arete but it was fun trying. Some of the routes just annoy me but I enjoyed figuring out where I was going on this one.

My hands were so fatigued at the end of the climbing session and I could barely hold my head up when I got home. Climbing, 42. 'Drea, 1.

Did Kenpo X today. There are always two segments that capture my attention. At the drag claw and punch point, Tony Horton says punchpunch in a funny way.

I am also captivated when he does this little monologue:

Take care of your body and it will take care of you because time keeps on ticking and you keep getting older. You can get better or you can get all gooey and crotchety, old, pathetic, icky, gross. Not me, not into it...

At the 12 minute mark, I usually feel my energy wane and Tony steps in with Where's your intensity?

During the Kenpo X breaks, I usually swing my kettlebell instead of doing whatever Tony and his crew are doing. I get back into the routine when it's time for jumping jacks. Didn't swing the kettlebell for long because my hands still smart. Punchpunch...

Went to Gloria's yoga class to get a dose of Gloria and yoga before Gloria heads off for vacation.  A couple of people complained of back pain so we did a back care class. It was so sweet that I could have rolled over on my yoga mat and turned in for the night.

At one point, we went into rag doll and Gloria said Release the head; let it be free and I did.

What made this class even sweeter is that I felt like I really nailed, alignment-wise, Warrior I for the first time.

The Invested Climber

Familiar View

I have been jonesing to swim but the winter break closure, weather and sickness have conspired to keep me away for over a month.

As my coworker Ariel likes to say, Tuesday is traditionally a swimming night but there's a no travel advisory. Plus, the pool (and just about every other facility) is closed anyway.

Went climbing yesterday and I was proud of myself because I made a decision to be more present and to not think about the possibility of rushing off to yoga afterward.

Being in the moment and focusing on climbing definitely helped since I was more invested and climbed better.

After Patti and I decided that we didn't have another route in us, I was tempted to start moving faster because I could have still made it to yoga. Although, I would have had to leave abruptly and drive hurriedly.

Of course, now that I've been in the house since 4 p.m., a yoga class sure would be nice.